It is crucial to be well-prepared and informed on how to communicate the message of a breakup, especially if there are children involved. During a divorce exit conversation, we can discuss your desires and resources for the future, as well as your thoughts on the impending change. We can establish a "action plan" in light of the situation you are facing. Properly preparing to bid farewell will benefit your co-parenting relationship in the years to come, for the happiness of your children and family. 

REMEMBER: The moment you tell your children about your decision to divorce will always be vividly clear to them. 

Many couples handle the decision maturely and well in relation to their children, expressing relief afterward. However, for the children, it is rarely a relief. It is a significant change in a child's life and usually not their wish. 

With a DIVORCE / EXIT CONVERSATION, we go through all the points and questions you both may have. In certain situations, we collaboratively create an agreement on how to proceed in the future, including when, how, and who should be involved in your decision.
After the divorce, you are still parents. Even though the marriage has ended, you still have a co-parenting responsibility that needs to function to ensure your children do not suffer or struggle in their new circumstances. 

Hurt feelings, conflicts, and old resentments can hinder cooperation. When new partners enter the picture, it can lead to new challenges and discussions. Blended families must balance their own lives with their parenting responsibilities involving ex-partners. 

Using a family-focused psychotherapist in therapy can be an option to prevent, untangle threads, or provide support in expressing conflicts and addressing needs. 

Topics which could be part of the exit sessions: (source: CFFU)

Your child may feel responsible:

• Be mindful of shifting responsibility back to you as adults. Explain that the divorce is an adult decision that the child had no influence over.
• Show that you take responsibility, even though you are upset.
• Allow space and time for conversations and the child's storytelling.

Missing mom and dad:

• Acknowledge and respect that your child misses the other parent.
• Even when the child is with you, they may still miss you - be present.
• Assure your child that it is okay to openly express missing mom or dad without it being used in any parental conflicts.

Cooperation between mom and dad:

• Practice creating a positive atmosphere and constructive cooperation focusing on your children.
• Seek help to develop a good cooperation.
• Address any conflicts when your children are not present.
• Never involve the children in conflicts.
• Always ensure that messages and communication between you pass through you, not through your children.

It is crucial for the well-being of your shared children and your own well-being to reach consensus amicably. Everyone must find their place in their new lives, surroundings, and perhaps new environments. 

Blended Families – Your Children and Mine 

Often, children find themselves caught in the middle or feel stuck between their parents. They may keep these feelings to themselves, not wanting to reveal them for the sake of their parents. This internal conflict may also manifest outwardly in the child's interactions at school, with friends, and more. Much can be supported and prevented by using a competent person to create balance in the family. 

Contact me for a supportive exit conversation or book an exit conversation for a peaceful farewell. I can be a guide to structure a challenging situation.